January was a busy month for me. My oldest daughter, a senior in high school, is applying to acting and musical theater programs for college, and the process (which is much different than anything I ever had to do applying to college for engineering) reached its most frenzied point this past weekend, when she and I went to New York City for something called “Unifieds.”
Unifieds (short for National Unified Auditions) is an event where a number of college, university, and conservatory theatre programs hold auditions and interviews of prospective students. It’s like a college fair, but with singing and dancing. I’ve only watched little snippets of the reality TV show “Dance Moms,” but walking around the studio buildings designated for Unifieds in Midtown Manhattan I felt like I was on that show. It was intense and busy and nerve-wracking, and I came out of it thinking that if my daughter could endure that experience still wanting to be in the performing arts, then she really would do it, one way or another.
When my daughter first expressed her love of the performing arts a few years ago, I tried to temper her enthusiasm. I tried to talk her into playing it safe and pursuing a career that wasn’t as risky. But I remember the moment I changed my mind—at a voice recital. When it was her turn, she walked up to the front of the room, smiled wide at the audience, announced her songs, and started singing. Watching her face light up with joy as she performed her two pieces, I was transfixed. That joy was all I needed to see to know that I could not stand in her way.
Last summer, when she finally made the decision that she wanted to go to college for acting and musical theater, she told me that she would rather try to pursue her dream and fail than to never try at all and regret it for the rest of her life. How could I argue with that logic?
Now, as we get through the last of her auditions for college and wait to see if she is accepted into any of the programs (which are all extremely hard to get into), it is more important than ever to remember why she is doing this in the first place. Because each time she receives a rejection, she has to shake off the failure, regroup, and keep going. And remembering why she is doing all this is what will help her see it through to the end.
I don’t know what the future holds for her, whether she will be on Broadway someday or making movies or working at an advertising firm or teaching kids at the local children’s theater. What I do know is that she will have success in her life, and she will also have failure. We all do. But my hope for her is that she doesn't let the successes go to her head or let the failures define her, that she doesn’t stop moving forward, and that she always finds the courage to continue.
- Kathryn Amira